Fury
by LonelyWoods92
Summary: "Reid and Morgan had sex on your desk!" - The BAU war of 2011. slightly Crack!fic One-Shot. warning: slash implied R


**Summary: "Reid and Morgan had sex on your desk!" **

**So, um, enjoy? I have no idea where this even came from :) **

Garcia was furious.

Her bright pink platform heels were leaving dents in the ground as she stomped through the bullpen, eyes glaring up at Aaron Hotchner's desk. Emily watched as the technical analyst's rampage passed her desk, only to be followed by two grown men begging at her feet.

"Garcia! We didn't mean to!" Penelope didn't even turn to acknowledge the young doctor as he pleaded from a few feet behind her.

"Baby Girl, C'mon, how were we supposed to know that would happen? You really don't need to do this." Morgan seemed like he was trying to keep his dignity intact by trying a different approach, but Garcia stayed undeterred from her mission.

As the trio grew closer and closer to the unit chief's office, Emily watched as Reid and Morgan grew more frantic; promising Penelope gifts, money, and sex –from Morgan at least-. Garcia only narrowed her eyes at their offers, seeming to pick up speed with her determination. The two boys shared a panicked look, running to get in front of her.

Just as the blonde woman had reached Hotch's office, Spencer slid in front of her, effectively blocking the door with his body. Morgan wasn't far behind, lying a hand on his baby girl's shoulder in an attempt to calm her down. She immediately shook him off, glaring at the young genius in front of her.

"Move out of the way Reid." Her voice was deadly, just waiting for the man to crumple at her will. Emily had to give Spencer credit for being able to stay standing.

By this time, Rossi had made his way out of his office and was standing five feet away from the confrontation. Emily moved closer, her curiosity getting the better of her, and she saw JJ doing the same out of the corner of her eye.

Reid looked as though he were about to make a stuttering retort when the door behind his back flew open and he tumbled backwards into the room.

Hotch stood in the doorway with an armful of genius, looking out at his team that had all gathered in a small semi-circle around his technical analyst and her two friends. He released Reid from his clutches, almost taking a step back from the look on Garcia's face, before speaking.

"What the hell is going on here?" He asked, looking to anyone for answers.

"Oh, you want to know what is going on Sir? Well, let me inform you then. R-"

"Garcia!" Reid somewhat squeaked, interrupting the computer goddess from her angry rant. Penelope persistently opened her mouth to continue speaking, but Morgan clamped a hand over it before she could say anything.

"C'mon Baby Girl, We swear that we didn't mean to interrupt Kevin's proposal." Derek's voice was desperate as he tried to bend his best friend to his wishes. Finally, Garcia nodded her head in acceptance and Morgan slowly released her mouth.

"Reid and Morgan had sex on your desk!" Morgan had tried to cover her mouth once again, but it was too late. The damage was done.

Rossi, JJ, and Prentiss all looked at each other, trying to evaluate if this was some sort of joke. By the way Reid was red from head to toe, his hands covering his mouth in shock, they got their answer. Morgan's hand was still covering Penelope's mouth, but he was staring at Hotch, trying to gage his reaction. Penelope was standing with her arms crossed over her chest, smugly staring at the two men that had completely ruined what should have been the best night of her life.

Last but not least, Hotch's jaw was almost touching the floor as he swayed slightly, grabbing the doorframe for support. They had… his desk…_ that he had been sitting at all day_.

"You… you… my desk?" a whine submerged from the back of the Unit Chief's throat as he stared at his two coworkers. How had he not even known they were dating? How had none of them known?

Technically, Garcia obviously knew, but Hotch wasn't thinking properly. The only conscious thought running through his head was everything he had ever learned about bleach and sanitizing sprays.

"They did it in the SUV too!" Garcia's voice was muffled by Morgan's hand, but the message was loud and clear.

"Yeah, well, Prentiss took a trip to Vegas and charged it to the work credit card!" Spencer squeaked, attempting to get the attention off him and his boyfriend before Garcia spilled any more of their secrets.

"What? Okay, that was one time! And at least I didn't steal all the extra coffee from the supply closet!" she yelled, pointedly glaring at Rossi.

"That was you!" Reid yelled, suddenly holding very much hate for the BAU legend standing in front of him.

"At least I haven't been giving Prentiss all of my files so I can leave early with my boyfriend!" Rossi snapped, glaring at Derek who was trying to disappear into the wall behind him.

"I knew I had more paper work, you jerk!" Prentiss yelled, getting up in Morgan's face, feeling angrier with him than she ever had before. Maybe it was just the heat of the moment, but everyone seemed to be PMS-ing.

"Hey, I'm not the one that has been giving guys your number on craigslist!" Derek exclaimed at the woman attacking him, using his eyebrows to point over to the liaison who thought she had avoided this whole battle.

"That's why all those old guys have been calling me and asking for 'Dickbusters'?" Emily's eyes widened as she stared at the woman in front of her. JJ opened her mouth to defend herself, trying to make sure she talked loud enough to be heard over Reid chewing out Rossi for taking all the coffee.

"Wait," she said, "But I'm not the one that hacks in to Reid's webcam to watch them!" Garcia's jaw fell slack as she shook her head at her fellow blonde.

"You what!"

Everything erupted into chaos. People were screaming, fighting, pushing, biting, tackling, and the witnesses would say that someone even threw a chair. It was wild in the bullpen, a complete jungle of wild animals that were screaming their lungs out in a battle of… whatever this was.

"My… you…desk." Hotch muttered, sliding slowly down the doorframe to the floor.

To this day, Hotch still has nightmares about Garcia broadcasting all 14 places Morgan and Reid had sex in or on the bureau's property and Reid threatening Rossi's life over a dozen bags of coffee.

**Haha okay, so I really don't know what this is.** **Review?**


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